The sound of flowing water nearby calmed his mind a little bit but the uneasiness was still there. The emptiness was in the soul and not in the mind yet he believed it's all a state of mind, after all a man has the power to control the mind he thought. It was still early morning and there was lot of work to be done before the actual day began. Those random flashes of moments and memories was frustrating, he tried to divert his attention for he had to leave, he had to let go. he went inside the kitchen, a usual neighborhood slowly coming to life from slumber caught his eye. There was the vegetable vendor shouting at the top his voice, kids running in school uniforms with the moms running behind them to give their lunch boxes, make them eat, handover forgotten items so on. He smiled at his own self for he wanted to talk, share the emptiness around him, discard it somehow.
Life had given him much more than he wanted and he had taken it for granted for what he thought was living, yes he had done it all he thought, lived it all but damn still that emptiness around...the feeling confused him at times, he could not believe he was helpless, no, he was not, he thought. he had always wanted to explain but she would not have understood, like all the others in his life but she was different he thought, she might as well would have or she would have atleast listened, tried to understand him he was sure.
She had made him laugh all the while she was around. He remembered her smile when he had whispered in her ears...There was a glint in her eyes, a naughty yet playful one and beautiful her smile was. His face turned grim as he was gazing aimlessly from the kitchen window. the kids had disappeared, the lane outside his house was empty just like the emptiness around. No, he thought to himself, he had to find a way, nobody could control his thoughts only he would, he Decided...as always! He diverted himself once again, in making early morning breakfast, scrambled eggs and bread toast he thought, just as he took out the pan a familiar scent of tea rode in from the kitchen window...again it brought back those flashes to his mind ....she always had tea in the mornings. He gazed out again but couldnt see who was making tea. He did not want to have breakfast anymore.
Music, he thought to himself and suddenly a smile appeared on his face. Yes music could divert his mind, he then rose and switched on his laptop, took out a random playlist and the voice of a lady sprang to life. The outcome however was not as pleasant as the song was, it was an old hindi song "tere bina zindagi se koi shikwa to nahi ....shikwa nahi, shikwa nahi..." the smile disappeared, not because it reminded him of her but because songs had this uncanny ability to suit themselves to the situations. was it just a coincidence? he thought, probably it was not. He switched the player off. He went to the kitchen window again for at last he had found a way. he decided he would live all those moments and relive them when he felt like for they were a part of him and couldnt be discarded. She was safe in those moments and no one could take her away from him. A moment longer he gazed out of the window at the empty street, one look at the wall clock told him it was time to get ready for the day's work.
He closed his eyes for a moment allowing those flashes to merge within his soul, enchant his mind, slowly opened his eyes a smile slowly made its way on his lips, his eyes had the hint of calm in them, his mind was at peace now. He took his clothes and made his way towards the soothing sound of the water filling in the bathroom, humming the same old hindi song, with the smile still intact for he knew he was in love all over again, yet he had no regrets...his heart knew she understood. The song had explained everything...it was the last song he had sung to her....."Only melodies can capture the strings of emotions, especially those which hearts understand".....the door closed behind him, the humming of the song continued.
To Be Continued....
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